Topic > Reflection on the book Don't say yes when you mean no

The book addresses the concept of assertiveness. It's a wake-up call for anyone who feels like they aren't measuring up to themselves and aren't being themselves. By not being assertive, one does not show the world who they really are, but projects and imagines what they should be. The book raises awareness about this and helps the reader express themselves more and helps them become more in tune with themselves. The book also makes the reader aware of the harmful effects that negative thoughts can have on his behavior. To stop these thoughts from dominating us, the author discusses the thought stopping technique where you say “STOP” as soon as you become aware of a negative or unwanted thought. How did the book contribute to my understanding of myself? Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an original essay What concept of self-awareness does the book address? In this book, the author bases his arguments on the importance of assertiveness in achieving one's goals and also for personal satisfaction. The title of the book itself spoke to me. I realized that I often do certain tasks for others at the expense of my time or even when I don't want to undertake the task. I also don't express my opinion and instead follow the opinion of others. In short, I almost always say yes, even when I would like to say no. I later regret not saying no. However, the cycle continues. I knew it was a problem, but I couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was. The book "Don't say yes when you want to say no" is based on assertiveness training, a specialization of behavioral therapy, which aims to help people stand up and take care of themselves, while maintaining a balance between passivity and aggression. I realized that that was exactly where the problem lay. I wasn't assertive enough. The book listed several reasons why you have assertiveness issues and I quickly realized that I wasn't assertive because I was afraid it would come across as aggression. I was afraid of hurting people and causing arguments if I expressed my opinions. I also realized that I was repressing many of my thoughts and emotions and not expressing them openly because people didn't accept them. On the other hand, I was bordering on passivity, which I realized was a very unhealthy behavior. Through the book, I understood several ways through which I could get what I wanted while maintaining harmonious relationships with others. How did I relate to the book? Before explaining the various assertiveness techniques, the author asks the reader to recognize what kind of assertiveness issues they are currently facing, whether it is the inability to communicate well with others, or being a pushover for earn the "respect" of others. Based on this, the reader is asked to think about what kind of changes he would like to make, thus helping him to set his assertiveness goals. I could refer to both the problem of communicating with others and the fear of becoming a pushover. So, I realized that these are the two areas that I need to focus on. The purpose of the book is to bring a change in the reader's life and help him communicate his thoughts, feelings and needs in a positive way and make changes. even in their unwanted behavior patterns. Regarding behavior change, the author places emphasis on the thoughts or situations that accompany the behavior, then helps the reader control these thoughts and bring about changes in the situation that lead to the unwanted behavior. I also made myself. ”